Macropenis, Megalopenis, Macrophallus, and medical neglect

We've all heard the term "micropenis", but it doesn't just mean "small". It's a medical term, and one which is used for classification to determine available treatment options. To have a micropenis is to be medically diagnosed as having an abnormally short penis.

So it would stand to reason that if being abnormally small is considered a medical condition, then being abnormally large would also be considered one, right?

Nope.

Medical science only seems to recognize those on the undesirably low side of societal expectations. To be significantly below average height is to be of "short stature", or even "dwarfism". But if you're exceptionally tall it's only considered to be an issue if your height was driven by a hormonal imbalance such as those caused by gigantism or acromegaly. If you're just tall for no reason, then you're just tall.

If you're severely overweight, then you're diagnosed with "obesity", possibly driven by hormonal or digestive abnormalities. But if you're one of those rare people with a metabolism that just won't quit and you can't put on weight or significant muscle no matter how hard you try, then you're just lucky I guess.

The same applies to male genitals. Got a small dick? Well that's a micropenis. One so big that it demands special accommodations in clothing and sex? You should feel blessed, they say. Small testicles? There are half a dozen genetic syndromes to explain your malady. But if you've got huge nuts, then well, they're just big.

To be clear, I am in no way claiming that men with overly large penises are suffering in the same way as men with abnormally small ones. Our problems are different, and we big guys have the benefit of society viewing our endowments in a favorable light.

The problems faced by men with large penises are two-fold. Popular culture is quick to dismissed our complaints away with a "whatever, you're lucky to have a dick like that" handwave. There's no consideration that having a huge cock is often a detriment to sex, and certainly not the instant orgasm machine that porn makes it out to be.

Advice to doctors

Medicine simply is not equipped to handle the issues that men with large penises face, nor their partners. Doctors are often woefully lacking in information on just how big condoms can go, let alone how to size condoms, properly fitting underwear, and more.

• Don't comment positively or negatively on a large penis. As with many things medical, professional detachment is important to helping a patient feel comfortable with expressing their issues. If you imply that they should be happy with having so big of a dick, then the patient will feel less like their issues are "real" problems, even if they deserve to be heard out.
• Read up on modern changes to condom sizing. Men with thick penises have many options these days compared to just a few years ago.
• Be aware of options such as pouch underwear for men that find regular underwear too restrictive but still need some scrotal support to make it through the day comfortably.
• Suggest penis bumpers like Ohnut for men with penises long enough that they're hitting women's cervixes. This is suggestion is in particular recommended for gynecologists, who seem to have a tendency to scoff at their patients implying their partner's large penis may be to blame for their lingering post-coital pain.

Having a large penis or being the partner of a man with one presents its own unique set of challenges. These are outlier problems that aren't addressed in school sexual education, nor should we expect them to be. But when patients present with issues caused by having an overly large penis in their life, they should be treated with the same care and respect as any other patient.

Defining "Macropenis"

So if we're too have suggestions for a man with a big dick, then perhaps we also need terminology to meet this condition. A few terms have been batted around with none catching on, like "megalopenis" or "macrophallus." I'm partial to "macropenis", as the semantic counterpart to "micropenis."

If we use the term macropenis because it's related to the already-established micropenis, then we can also use the diagnostic criteria of the small side to inform the criteria for the large side. Micropenis is defined as being 2.5 standard deviations below average, which results in an adult male penile length shorter than 3.8 inches, which is roughly 1 out of every 150 men. Similarly, a girth of 3.3 inches or smaller would fit the same -2.5 SD criteria. Thus, we can say that +2.5 SD above average in length or girth would qualify, which leads to a macro penis has a length of at least 7.25 inches or a girth greater than 5.8 inches.

While that might not seem like a "huge penis" (especially if years of porn have warped your perception), those fit the same 1-in-150 likelihood and many partners would agree that those dimensions are at or beyond the threshold of problematically large — especially the girth.

Having a macropenis presents its own unique set of issues, and it's time for medicine to recognize that and treat those men with the same professionalism and support that they hopefully provide to all the rest of their patients.